Missed Opportunity!

To those who follow this blog you may be surprised to find an ‘April’ entry. We must now all face up to reality and assume that Cirqe du Soleil have not taken up my high wire repair the water tank routine. The interview went well enough but I was somewhat upset having to share a dressing room with a former Olympic gymnast who was also auditioning with some gimmicky turn yourself inside out and back to front whilst blindfolded and set ablaze en-route to the apex of the marquee.

The actual routine went very well despite my mankini displacing certain parts of my genitalia for all to see. I thought it added a certain something but it made my eyes water and I accidentally released the safety ropes which supported the tank and plummeted to the performance deck. I fail to see how I am to blame for severe injuries to several performers; ‘Should they have been there?’ I asked. ‘Yes, they are the stars of the show!’ was the reply, as I was bundled unceremoniously into a taxi – without the fare or my water tank! Thus I will be seeing out my current VSO contract (unless other offers flood in!). Sadly no photographs available!

Recent excitement was experienced in Thailand, initially in Bangkok then both north and south for a bit of ‘RnR’. Our fist BKK stop saw Jan attend the Bangkok Nursing Home (BNH) for a referral appointment and minor procedure. What a place, like going into a five star hotel with people to meet and greet you. Mind you all the (very attractive) nurses wore very smart white uniforms and looked a bit like Nurse Ratchet in One Flew Over The Cookoo’s Nest but much better looking. We wondered why the NHS couldn’t live up to this standard considering all the money that goes into it. However, we also wondered what poor Thais experienced at the non-private version. Jan’s consultant looked about ten but did a fantastic job for which we are very grateful (and Axa Life, VSO medical insurance Company, who covers the costs incurred, thank you!)

As for BKK you can keep it! Very busy, hot and with a non-joined up transport company. As a consequence Tuk-Tuk drivers constantly try to rip you off together with taxi drivers who don’t know where anything is. I suppose like other big cities they see tourists as ‘fair game’ during holiday season. We were told that hotel bookings were at only 15-20% of the normal occupancy with tourists substantially reduced due to ‘Le Crunch’ and civil unrest. Shopping malls all over the place, largely empty, and we felt quite pricy in current circumstances. Thus the city feels like any other in the world with same type shops in air conditioned consumer temples. Stop home and spend your air fare on ‘home goods’ – you won’t get as hot, sticky or frustrated either. Did I enjoy BKK, not over other major cities I’ve visited, another one ticked off my list, but I won’t rush to return in the near or long term future (unless ‘The Cirque’ has second thoughts!)


Massage parlours abound throughout the country, some actually legitimate! Imagine our surprise to see the advert the only one of its type we saw throughout the country (see photo insert). At first we thought it was a male only ‘adventure’ but as this offer was available to both males and females we came to the conclusion that they put a herbal concoction into a slow release sphere of some kind and use this in the massage. On consideration we feel that it be better if it read herbal-ball massage.

We arranged a package deal via TAT (Thai tourist board) to visit Kohn Chang and the ancient former capital of Thailand, Chiang Mai. Luxury minibus picked us up, on time, from our BKK hotel and we arrived at Koh Chang, an island near the Cambodian border, some five hours and a short forty five minute ferry ride after leaving BKK. We toured the island by motor bike (wearing helmets, of course). The beaches are lovely providing ‘Bounty Bar advert’ type scenery with the sea a surreal bath temperature (very different to the sea of the Cornish coast which freezes your nadgers off, even in high summer – this is a note for Trevor and Sue Smith!)

The day prior to our transfer north we watched BBC News reporting on the civil demonstrations in BKK. We feared the worst when the report commented about the declaration of a state of emergency in BKK. However, the minibus duly arrived, only fifteen minutes late, and we arrived at 1700hrs at Huopplong train station in BKK (see photo) as expected to catch our 1800hr overnight sleeper to Chaing Mai. We saw very little by way of police and military presence in BKK only on the way into the airport to drop off other passengers. The train left on time and rumbled its way north. We ate a (surprisingly adequate) meal and soon retired to a greater than expected sleep on bunks made up by a very efficient steward. Morning arrived we ate breakfast (this time surprising inadequate) and soon after arrived at Chaing Mai station to be greeted by our transport to the hotel.


After a few days we venture north to Chaing Mia the old capital of Thailand. This was much more to our taste! It was relatively small (but growing rapidly) and you can still see the old city walls. It had a fairly laid back peaceful feel about it. Hotel was good with a east / west breakfast. As you can see from the photo Jan seems to be in her element her own massage parlour next to a chocolate shop! From here we took an organised tour to the ‘Golden Triangle’ – the infamous border area where Laos, Burma and Thailand all converge. Here is where various drugs, mainly heroin, were traded across the Mekong River via no man’s island or ‘goods’ and money thrown into fast moving ‘long tail’ boats. Our guide told us that the main trade is now amphetamines which the local farmers apparently give to their oxen to enable them to work harder and longer. So if you should some across one steer clear as it’s probably as high as a kite!

We returned back to BKK via bus, a mere nine hours, to a smart centrally located hotel. Here we met Jan’s niece Hannah and her fiancé Al who were on tour! We had a lovely time doing tourist things and it was great to see someone from home! The latter part of our stay saw us visit the Grand Palace and we really splashed out having afternoon tea in the authors lounge at the Oriental hotel, a vestige from the ‘good old days’ of Conrad, Wilde etc, etc . The setting was impressive together with accomplished guitarist. It was very good even with a menu choice of twenty teas plus tasting notes; however, Jan’s scones are better!

The last day saw Jan get an all clear from her consultant. So, all in all, an excellent trip when we packed a lot into a relatively short time. Who says you can’t mix business and pleasure??